A year ago, or so, a friend asked me
to write about a particular game we played in high school. I told him I would
do it, but I had no plans for such. At the time, I had done a couple of stories
about my high school. Guys raved over those tales, shared them up and down and
soaked in past memories. It was nice, but I backed out. I did not wish to be
the writer lost in ‘high school nostalgia’. So, I shelved writing
anything about high school.
Subsequently, I forgot about the promise I had made
to my buddy, a solid, smart chap.
Days fell off the calendar. I
thought about the game and high school. I would meet up former schoolmates and
we would trade narratives on how awesome the game was. How it was the only
thing that could make us want to return to high school again. But I think we’ve
been blowing smoke each other’s ass. Nobody wants to return to a place where
you had to be in class by six a.m. We had enough of that.
The game though has been hanging
over me like a dark cloud. I think about it most of the time, but never writing
about it and keeping the promise. I guess my buddy forgot about it or thought
to himself, “What kind of bullshit writer is Osoch? The chap can’t do a
simple story about a game? A freaking game!!?” Sorry mate... It’s this animal, life.
I was going through the screenshots on
my phone and I came up to the conversation with my buddy about the game. As
with most guys, it was punctuated with laughter. The Bible teaches us to live
up to our promises. As a humble, God-fearing guy, I thought to myself, “I
really need to write that story.” I don’t want to be struck down by angels
for not keeping promises.
The semester has drawn to a close. I
recently finished exams and have had loads of time in my hands. It’s spilling
out, (time), I don’t know how to spend it. The factory setting is read stories,
write stories and sleep, a lot of sleeping. Funny enough, I swear it’s
witchcraft, there’s no sleep. I sauntered out of bed at 3 a.m. Normal days, I
struggle to wake up, but after exams, it’s like the body clock shifts
completely. I am alert as a soldier in the mountains of Afghanistan, battling the
Taliban.
It’s 4:11 a.m. as I type through
this. It’s raining outside, the rhythm of the past few weeks. This is a perfect
time to have a partner and cuddle away the flinging cold. Earlier, I sat up in
bed, the duvet pulled to my chest and thought about the game we played in high
school. I thought about my friend too, he who made the request. I haven’t seen
him in two years. We haven’t WhatsApped in a while. He went off-grid, maybe to
declutter and clear his head. You know the social media AWOL that millennials
pull these days. Who knows? Where could he be? How’s life coming on him? Anyway,
when I post this story, I’ll hit him up and see what’s cooking.
The game, we christened it UEFA. We
all know what UEFA means, the Champions League, where the big boys of European
football slaughter each other. Now, what am yet to understand is how the name
UEFA founds its way into the game. When I arrived, a blue form one, the game
was termed as UEFA, even teachers had the idea. When I left, it was still UEFA.
Who came up with such a name for the game? Who was the first person to utter
the word? How did he feel when it slipped out of his mouth? Does he have any
idea that he started a movement? Does he still think of UEFA wherever he is?
For those struggling to understand
UEFA, it was an amateur football game. We decided on the rules, FIFA had no
say, though we used standard FIFA balls. The rest of the guidelines were on us.
Rules of UEFA were simple. Two teams playing each other. One team couldn’t have
all the star players. There was no offside. Tackles were allowed, and boy we
did shovel each other. There was no referee. Stuff like handball was handled by
common sense. We used handball goalposts as the goalposts. Basically, it was
street football on another level. Oh, one last rule, you played it barefoot. To
play with shoes was an abomination.
UEFA defined high school for many of
us in ways that nothing did. UEFA was our first love. And ask anyone who went
through Kapsabet, the demon in the background is UEFA. We think of it in
workplaces and offices. UEFA chases us through campus halls. There’s fella
who’s arguing with his wife, he thinks of UEFA to forget. A chap in his honeymoon
will think about UEFA. The spouse will get mad, wonder if he’s remembering hoes
from his past. It’s not that sweetie. It’s a beautiful game, it’s UEFA.
The guys reading this and played
UEFA, there’s a bond. An invisible cord joining all of us. Those who did not
get a chance to be part of it, you have no idea what you missed. Anyway, you’re
awesome in your own ways. And I know you too were part of some ulterior rituals
which we will never understand or come to know of. To us, UEFA was Baba na Mama.
We played in the evenings, 4 p.m. to
6 p.m. We would sweat, score loads of goals against each other. But when the
bell for supper went, we would scatter like wildebeests. Boys and food.
To Tony Manyara, cheers bro. Si we
are cool now.
😁😂🤣🤣🤣🤣.Hated this type of street football but it was fantastic.I have never loved football since the time I injured my left hand small finger and had to hide it from my mother.She was ruthless when it come to matters dealing with injuries.I never played the game but I adored it.Ooh you mentioned Manyara,the nickname stuck to eternity,He was a good deskmate of mine.I cherish the memories.
ReplyDeleteWhere have I been all along?? ,I must have missed lots of sweet stories
ReplyDeleteUEFA was a ritual,a bonding event,a boxing event,you name it😂I was a fan of football but I never really knew how to play the game,then came UEFA.We had watched a Liverpool game the previous day and witnessed Origi show no mercy on the opposing team and then it happened.Just like Origi ,I scored two goals (a brace) just by waiting for the ball near the post and tapping that sucker in😂hence branded the name Origi everytime we stepped on the pitch,everyone somehow forgetting Roy,a name I was given after two years of birth (I was named Obama before they changed it😂😭)
ReplyDeleteAfter a weekend full of UEFA, Monday preps was something else bro. Nice piece
ReplyDelete