SPRING IN FALL

 At the start of 2020, I was on the up and up. Everything was going well. God had smiled upon me, but the devil had also taken a shine to me, like Mike Tyson says. In the following months, I was caught in a shitstorm of experiences that brought extreme confusion to my young world. The three years that followed were blank years, in the sense that I wasn’t fully there as a person. In that time frame, I was trying to make sense of the transformation I was undergoing. If hell’s basement has a basement, that was my location, metaphysically.

In that mire, I forgot to pay for this domain. I recall seeing the notification that I needed to pay. The money was there, but I didn’t see the point of having this site, I was no longer interested in whatever I had going on. So, I ignored it like I have ignored things, people, relationships, friendships, situationships.

Bots scooped up the site.

When I emerged from the drama of self and wanted the domain back, it was available for a marked-up price, almost 4500 $. I like this domain, but there’s no way I would pay that much for it. I also didn’t need it that much, circa 2022. I wasn’t writing a lot. I was still processing the tough questions that self-exploration brings. The few writings I made, I posted them on Medium, and I might move them here later. And then I totally forgot about this domain, about writing.

I went into a winter of literary hibernation. I had a few jumbled thoughts here and there, but nothing coherent that made sense. And I am not one to write when it’s not pouring out of me. I only write when I am fully present when I am alert when there’s no forcing it. I want my words to be alive and ring true to everyone who reads them. There’s a lot of dead writing in the world. I don’t want my writings to be in the graveyard. I want my work to have a strong heartbeat, to move, to touch, to commune with the reader.

Many people have inquired about the writing, and the truth is that this is a hobby. While it can pay bills and keep the lights on, it’s not something I want to be a career. I too thought I wanted to pursue writing as a career but after a few discussions with myself, I realized I am not that of a serious writer. I want to explore with my writing. I want to play with words. I want to break the rules of grammar and be totally unconventional. While you readers might enjoy that, the market doesn’t respond to that. The market is very straightforward.

Thus, careerwise I’m pursuing something totally unrelated to writing.

This little anecdote is to let you guys know that we got the domain back. “We” because this site is a human junction of stories. We might be separated by distance but we’re joined at heart.

I am trying to see if the email subscription still works. If you’ve received an email about this, reply and let’s kick it for a bit.

Salut.